Women and Christlike Attributes
Shortly before my first Mother's Day
Today is Mother’s Day. It’s a day set aside every year to celebrate moms and all they’ve done for us from the time we were born throughout our childhood and even now as adults. Because we really don’t ever stop being our mother’s little boy or girl. But with that being said I want to first discuss the fact that all women are mothers. In Genesis 3:20 “Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.” Before they had left the Garden of Eden and before she had any children she was already a mother. And Sheri Dew once said, “Motherhood is more than bearing children, though it is certainly that. It is the essence of who we are as women. It defines our very identity, our divine stature and nature, and the unique traits our Father gave us.” And this thought is what I want to focus on. The Christlike attributes that seem to be in the very nature of womanhood.
There are so many examples of righteous women in the Scriptures. Ruth’s faith to leave her homeland, Esther’s courage to stand up for her people, Mary and Martha receiving Jesus into their home, Abish remaining true even alone as a believer among her people the Lamanites. Similarly in my life I have had the great fortune of many righteous women whose faith and love have been an example to me.
I have seen firsthand how women of all situations have been mothers to me. Some of these examples I’m going to share may seem silly or insignificant to those who weren’t there and didn’t experience the love and tenderness that I did. But to me they are truly meaningful as I even remember them years later. After helping one struggling single mother I fell asleep on her couch and when I woke up the next morning she had brought blankets out to keep me from getting cold and had tucked me in like one of her kids. Another woman (married with no children at the time) took care of me when I was sick by getting me medicine and a place to rest. Another woman (neither married nor with kids) cooked breakfast for me one morning and it reminded me of times my mother had done the same for me. Little acts of kindness like this have been so common from these women and whether or not they have intended it they have all exemplified Christian discipleship.
Service:
The first attribute I have already briefly mentioned and that is selfless service. Christ spent His life going about doing good and that’s what He taught the disciples. As we’ve studied the New Testament this year we have seen how He ministered to friend and stranger alike. One of the most intimate examples of this is in John 13. “He riseth from supper, and laid aside his garments; and took a towel, and girded himself. After that he poureth water into a basin, and began to wash the disciples’ feet, and to wipe them with the towel wherewith he was girded.”
Unsurprisingly I’m going to use my mom as an example a lot because of the impact she has had throughout my life. (And it is mother’s day) My mother dedicated her life to raising me and my siblings. For those who don’t know I’m one of ten children: nine boys and a girl. And to say the least we were no angels then and we are not much better now. Many have said my mom is a saint and I’m still not sure why anyone would willingly make the decision to deal with so many boys. But my mother truly wanted the best for us and this was demonstrated every day. She ensured we always had food to eat including cooked meals. She made sure we had clean clothes and got to baseball practice or piano lessons. She taught the Gospel in the home as well as helped out with homework. And to be honest that’s about all she’s done for the past forty years. She knows what our needs are and she tends to them. When you’re young you don’t really appreciate this selfless service as much as when you are older.
Sacrifice:
Service and sacrifice go hand in hand for me. Once again Christ’s life and purpose was one of sacrifice. He never thought of Himself. He never complained. He endured so much suffering for each of us culminating in the Atonement in the Garden and on the Cross. Moms do the same. They sacrifice education, careers, sleep, sanity, travel, friends, their bodies. They give up on their childhood dreams for better ones. All for those they love more than anything else. Elder Holland said in a talk, "There are some lines attributed to Victor Hugo which read: She broke the bread into two fragments and gave them to her children, who ate with eagerness. ‘She hath kept none for herself,’ grumbled the sergeant. ‘Because she is not hungry,’ said a soldier. ‘No,’ said the sergeant, ‘because she is a mother.’”
Another amazing woman I want to share as an example is a woman by the name of Janice Ahuna. She was an institute teacher and wife of the branch president where I lived in Hawaii. She was in this calling for quite a few years and dedicated hours every week to preparing lessons, cooking food, giving rides to people without cars. And on top of all this I never saw her get angry or complain or think about herself. Even if only a couple of people showed up she was there and ready to go. She - like so many others - made this sacrifice without a desire of recognition or reward. She did it because it was the right thing to do and it blessed the lives of others.
Mercy and Forgiveness:
“Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.” In recent weeks we have read about the story of the man who forgave his servant a massive loan - one that was impossible to pay back. On the cross Christ said, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34). Time and again Christ showed mercy and taught parables about forgiveness to those who have done wrong or harmed us. And I will be honest this is often one of the hardest attributes for me to personally develop. So often my initial reaction is punishment or justice - even if I don’t say it that’s the thought that is in my heart.
Similar to what Cason said. But my mother has shown me repeatedly how to give a person another chance and to not give up on anyone for the choices they have made. She understands so much better than I do that mercy can change hearts and heal wounds much more so than getting even or getting back what was lost. I had one friend who helped me heal a relationship with a brother I had distanced myself from. She had the wisdom to tell me to not wait on him to make contact but that I should move past the hurt and reach out and just talk to him. Once again it was a little thing and maybe she remembers or maybe she doesn’t but her encouragement helped heal a broken family bond.
Charity:
The last attribute is the foundation for these and all other Christlike attributes: the pure love of Christ or charity. It’s the virtue that never fails (1 Corinthians 13:8). Unsurprisingly this is the motto for the Relief Society. Going back to the Sheri Dew quote it just seems that women have it in their nature to love more easily and without judgement. The people I have mentioned judge by the best of people and not by their worst. They take in the downtrodden especially little children. Compassion flows from their souls and the world is a better place because of this pure love.
To give a couple of final examples first I have a cousin who embodies Christlike love in how she raises her children. Before they can even talk she teaches them of Christ. She dedicates every day to teaching them obedience and respect. She in so many ways embodies a wife that loves her husband and a mother who loves her children and puts them first above everything else. Second I have a friend who isn’t married and is possibly the kindest and sweetest person I’ve ever met. I can’t imagine her ever wishing harm on anyone even if they had done wrong to her. She endures hardships and takes it in stride. No matter what her love for others never diminishes. She is really one of the examples of Christlike love I return to often when I think of how I should act in a situation.
Testimony:
I want to finish up with a couple of thoughts and my testimony. For all the men I would strongly encourage you to read or watch President Nelson’s message from the Priesthood session last month. One of my favorite quotes was, “we need to do better and be better in how we honor the women in our lives, beginning with our wives and daughters, our mothers and sisters.” I definitely know that I could be much better with how I treat my mother and others. I have not always been as grateful as I should have. I have so often taken her for granted. There were times recently where I didn’t like decisions that were made and once again distanced myself from her. We don’t know how much time our moms will be with us and like every cherished relationship we need to treasure it and nourish it while we can. I owe practically everything to her. My mom is a convert and so I have her (along with my dad) to thank for my knowledge of the Gospel. I have never seen her waiver in the faith through trial after trial. And even as she sees children struggle or wander she never gives up hope on any of us. Take the time today to call your mother if this is possible and tell her thank you and tell her you love her. And then don’t just do it today but do it often.
This is the Church of Jesus Christ and the fulness of the Gospel is found here. The Book of Mormon testifies of Him. I know these are true and boldly testify that righteous living and covenant keeping will see us return Home one day. Jesus is my Savior, Redeemer, Master, Brother, Friend. Hope is possible because of Him. I say these things in His name. Amen.
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